Paris- 2004

Hard to believe we were in Paris this time last year (disregard the date on the photo-- I didn't notice that it was not set while we were there taking pictures, so all our photos are dated incorrectly). It's a beautiful place-- vibrant, alive, delicious! Just around the corner from our Hotel was the Rue Rivoli. Long, glowing red/orange lights were strung across the street as far as we could see. They had the festive air of Japanese lanterns, as they reflected beautifully off the damp streets.

The plaza in front of the Hotel de Ville had been turned into an ice rink, and skaters skimmed across the sparkling surface until late at night. The day we walked up the Champs Elysees was sunny and bright, and the Arc d' Triomphe was dazzling. We enjoyed creative window displays and varied architecture for many blocks before heading back toward our arrondisement.

Paris is cold in December! We warmed our hands with hot chestnuts every time we went out. One euro would buy a paper cone heaped with the warm, sweet nuts, pulled off the grill when we ordered them. The best ones were found in front of the BHV department store, across the street from our hotel, and next to the maker of delicious crepes.

We ate cheaply, but well. Breakfast was yogurt and juice purchased from a tiny grocery store and "refrigerated" outside our window on the window ledge, along with coffee from a nearby cafe. For lunch we enjoyed quiches, crepes, sandwiches, or pastries from small bakeries or street vendors, and for supper, more of the same, except for the days when we brought fruit, cheese, and chocolate back to our room to enjoy over a good book.

What does all this have to do with making time for things that matter?

These are the the sort of things that matter! The trip was a long planned celebration of Taylor's graduation-- he'd graduated from high school (homeschool, of course) and community college without much fanfare, and he will graduate from his four-year college in May 2006. He will be getting married only a week later, so any family celebration would have to happen before then.

He chose Paris for his celebration, and when inexpensive tickets ($212 r/t) became available, we jumped at the chance to spend a week there in the off-season. We attended the discount Friday night at the Louvre; walked miles each day, seeing historic sights-- Notre Dame, Place de Vosges, Ile d Cite, the Eiffel Tower, Shakespeare and Co bookstore, the Cluny museum, the Musee d' Mode, and the Musee d'Orsay, and the Jardin du Luxembourg, and much more. It is definitely possible to travel cheaply anywhere you go, and it is certainly worth it.

I thoroughly enjoyed spending one-on-one time with him; we got to practice our fledgling French; we took a lot of photos; and we made memories that will always be with us. I want to do something special and memorable with each of our children before they move on in life, because for me, building relationships and memories with family is one of the things in life that really matters.

Carpe diem!

Losing Context

I'm living in a snow globe today. Thick, soft snow is falling gently, silently blanketing trees, shrubs, cars. It's our first real snow of the season, and though we probably won't end up with more than 2-3", it's still a delight. I just hope the roads are clear enough for the guys to get home safely from work or school.

I had a virus last week, and spent a little time doing some light reading. Two of the books I chose were 80-100 years old, and as I read them, I realized that modern readers have little context for the type of conflict that consumed the characters in these novels. This lack of context can seriously affect our appreciation of the tales.

One of the books was a typical cozy mystery, and the main character, Miss Silver, is a Miss Marple-like older lady who knits while making sharp observations of those around her. I can picture her as I read, because I remember a pair of similar-appearing older ladies from my childhood. If I didn't have that context, though, the character would simply seem unreal, making the story unbelievable.

The second book presented a situation that I initially found ludicrous-- a cruel husband banishes his wife, and she is forced to take refuge in another man's house. She is so mortified by this that she spends most of the rest of her life in a convent. While this probably was an early version of a Harlequin-type romance, readers of the time probably had enough context to empathize with the character. I'm afraid I just couldn't get into it.

Sometimes "light reading" is too light to be worth the time and effort it takes to see into and through the cultural changes. I find it interesting that truly great literature-- Chaucer's Canterbury Tales or Shakespeare's plays, for example-- don't seem to suffer quite as much from contextual shift. Chaucer's Pardoner stands, century after century, as one of the most odious religious charlatans ever encountered, and Shakespeare's Lear inspires a gamut of emotions, from outrage to pity, as he wends his foolish way across the page. And is there any heart too hard to be moved by Jean Valjean in Les Miserables?

Great literature is challenging, but worth it. It is great because although costumes and accents may change, the deepest human emotions are evoked in a way that rings true across centuries. Lighter fare-- twinkies for the mind-- nourishes the soul about as well as junk food does the body. An occasional snack won't kill you, but a steady diet of fluff will rot the mind.

I'm over my virus now, and looking forward to weightier fare, both for mind and body. But it will have to wait until I throw a snowball or two!

Being Thankful

gratitude / gratitju:d / noun. LME.
1- The quality or condition of being grateful or thankful; the appreciation of and inclination to return kindness; gratefulness, LME> b An instance or expression of gratefulness... (Shorter Oxford English Dictionary, Fifth Edition)

It is a good thing to give thanks unto the Lord... to show forth [His] lovingkindness in the morning, and [His] faithfulness every night. Psalm 92:1-2

Thou hast given so much to me,
Give one thing more, - a grateful heart;
Not thankful when it pleaseth me,
As if Thy blessings had spare days,
But such a heart whose pulse may be Thy praise.
(George Herbert)

Thanksgiving Day comes, by statute, once a year; to the honest man it comes as frequently as the heart of gratitude will allow. (Edward Martin)

"If we meet someone who owes us a debt of gratitude, we remember the fact at once. How often we can meet someone to whom we owe a debt of gtratitude without thinking about it at all!" (Goethe)

"He who receives a benefit with gratitude repays the first installment on his debt." (Seneca)

"Gratitude is a fruit of great cultivation; you do not find it among gross people." (Samuel Johnson)

Not what we say about our blessings, but how we use them, is the true measure of our thanksgiving. (W. Purkiser)

O Lord my God, I will give thanks to thee forever. (Psalm 30:12)

A single day of Thanksgiving in a year is good, but blessings are not limited to a single day. How much better 365 days of thanksgiving to meet 365 days of grace?

In everything, give thanks!

SAT/ACT- What's the Difference?

I was at a College and Career Fair over the weekend, and I attended a panel discussion of college admissions officers. One of the most interesting things that came up is the difference between the ACT and the SAT. This difference was later confirmed by the Princeton Review representative who was there to offer test-taking tips.

Both exams test language arts and math, and both have an essay component. However, the SAT essay is mandatory, and the ACT is optional. Each test is popular in certain geographic areas, and each is accepted by most colleges.

So, what's the difference? According to the admissions counselors, the ACT is a test of what you've learned, while the SAT is a test of how well you've learned to take tests. The ACT was described as "straightforward," while the SAT was described as "tricky."

But wait... before everyone stampedes off to sign up for the ACT, let's talk about this. Some of the SAT problems discussed in the later test-taking workshop could certainly be considered tricky-- if you're rushing through the test or have limited reading comprehension. However, if you do a bit of test-prep in advance, and learn how the test is written, and what to watch for, the SAT is a valid and reputable exam. Many people have scored perfectly on one or both sections, so it is certainly possible to do well by being prepared and taking your time.

My impression of the two tests is that the SAT is the more serious of the two-- at least in the essay department. The SAT essay questions tend to be high-school level, focusing on abstract topics such as happiness. They are well presented, with a quote on the topic, followed by the essay question. The ACT essay questions seem to me to be more 'junior-high' level-- not quite "describe your favorite vacation," but not much harder than that, either. (You'll find links on my website- www.everydayeducation.com- to the home sites for the SAT and ACT, as well as to my essay prep workshop.)

If you're trying to decide which exam to take, I would suggest checking the website of the colleges you'd like to attend. They will most likely state their preference somewhere within the "Prospective Students" pages. If they don't state a preference, I would start by taking the SAT. If you don't do as well as you hoped, you can take the ACT. And of course, you always have the option of retaking either of them as many times as you like.

Remember, genuine life-long learning is what matters in the long run!

Telephone Tyranny

Miss Manners Advocates Courtesy to Companions Instead of Telephone Thralldom

I could have written Miss Manners' column today--have you read it? (Click on the article title to see it as it appeared in the Washington Post.) I liked the headline given to the column by the Richmond TimesDispatch headline writer-- "Taking phone calls while attending others is rude." Yes, it is! (And making a caller wait while you check to see if a second call might be more interesting is also rude, but that’s a discussion for another day!)

And guess what? Taking phone calls when you should be doing something else can also be the little fox that spoils a day. What happens when the phone rings as the family sits down to dinner? Or if the phone rings just as you've gathered the children for school, or are right in the middle of a history lesson? In our home, voice mail catches it; and the call is returned when it's convenient. Interestingly, most calls require no return call-- they are just a reminder. If answered, they would have interrupted an important activity, but like the mail, they are helpful when dealt with at a suitable time.

What often happens if someone answers the phone in those circumstances? If it's the first part of November, you often get stuck listening to a politician; other times of the year it may be a solicitation from a charitable organization, a survey, or just a random call from a friend or acquaintance.

How often is the phone interruption more important than supper and conversation with your family, or a cuddly reading session with your kids, or a challenging school lesson? If the phone is allowed to interrupt important things, things that matter for a lifetime, your children will learn that nothing—not even family relationships—are more important than attending to the phone god.

If answering the phone interrupts a conversation or important activity with the people who matter most in your life, or if it leaves any companion sitting and waiting, it's rude. Miss Manners blames Alexander Graham Bell's summons to his assistant upon the invention of the "infernal machine" for the "idea that a telephone summons was an imperial command that could not be safely ignored." (From Miss Manners syndicated column, 11/5/05, http://tinyurl.com/boge8.) She marvels that "years of inconsequential blathering have not dispelled that notion."

I want to give the best part of my days to the people and things that are most important to me-- my family and home. To that end, I spend time each week planning how to fit in everything-- support for the son who is job-hunting, homework discussions with the son who's in college, school time for the two who are still in high school, talk-time with my husband, general family time, and care for my 92 y/o mother. That's six people just in our household. Add in a bit of talk-time with the older boys' fiancées, my (very sweet) in-laws, and other family members, plus fellowship time, and the list of people I want to maintain relationships with gets longer. And on top of that, I enjoy some quiet time to start and end each day, in order to refocus my heart. I'm betting that many of you have a similar list of people and things in your life, and maybe even similar goals.

So how can you take care of the people and things that matter most in your life? By deciding exactly who and what they are, and purposing that when you have time to spend with them, you will wholeheartedly be with them. Take it from me, time with your family is short-- my two oldest sons will be married by this time next year, Lord willing. It doesn't seem all that long since they were playing pirates out on the picnic table under a bright autumn maple. I treasure memories of dinners together, books read on the sofa, Lego fortresses built, term papers discussed, and just last week, Frisbee practice out in the driveway (they're better than I am, for sure!). The phone tried to interrupt those times, but we chose to focus on our priorities and to return the calls when convenient. You can do this too!

Three steps toward eliminating the tyranny of the "infernal machine:"

Begin by listing the things you must do and the things you would like to do during your home time. Prioritize according to heart value, allocating the best parts of your day to the people and things that are most important to you, and other things that are your responsibility. With this list of priorities clear in your mind, you can put technology to work for you.

First, invest in a telephone with Caller ID capability, and order the service from your phone company (it’s included if you use cell phones as home phones; usually less than $5 a month otherwise). Caller ID is the most wonderful technological advance since phones were invented—it makes it possible for you to catch any truly important calls, while deferring others to a more convenient time. Important calls include calls from your spouse or children; calls from a relative for whom you are a caregiver; calls from your employer; and calls from customers if you are in a business where you on call for emergency response. Any other call can usually wait until your designated phone time.

Second, invest in an answering machine or voice mail. Either one allows your caller to record a message so that you can call back at a convenient time. Your message can be brief and clear: “Hi! You have reached [however you’d like to identify yourself]. Please leave a message or call back between 3 and 5 PM. Thank you!”

Third, tactfully let others know that there are times when you simply are not available to the phone. I don’t answer the phone before 9 AM, during school, while I am at my mother’s place, or after Donald comes home from work. I also rarely answer if I am in a conversation with someone in the household. This leaves 3-6 PM as the time when I may usually be reached by phone. You may choose another time for your phone time, but the principle is the same—just as you open mail when it’s convenient, you can deal with the phone when it’s convenient.

Homeschooling families should understand this idea—many already implement it. Others may choose not to understand why you are making a change, and that’s unfortunate. However, if you are focused on making time for things that matter, you’ll keep your heart fixed on that goal, and not be derailed by those who don’t understand. I can assure you, based on my own experience, that most people get used to the idea, assume you’re just a little odd, and get over being annoyed.

Be consistent in using the tools of technology—Caller ID and answering machine—and courteous in your manner, and you’ll have more time to spend with the people and things that matter most. Your home will be more peaceful, and you will be acting on your most deeply held values. You’ll even be more courteous to everyone you are with. Miss Manners is certain to approve!
(Copyright 2005- Janice Campbell)

Write a novel in November!

It's been a hectic week in Lake Woebegon...

So, since I've nothing else to do, I'm trying to decide whether to take on NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) again this year. Last year, I got 15,000 or so words into a middle-grade historical fiction novel before houseguests descended and my goal of writing 1800 words a day disintigrated. Life just keeps happening.

If you don't know about NaNo, it's a crazy plot to get people writing. The goal is to write a 50,000 word book in just 30 days-- the month of November. Thousands of people sign up at the website, National Novel Writing Month, and write madly until they either finish, or life intervenes. A surprising number of people-- thousands, it seems-- finish each year, and can celebrate madly. Last year was my first try, and it was fun and addictive!

This year, if I decide to do it, I might work on my non-fiction book, Doing College Your Way. It's been incubating for several years, and I've actually used portions of it as a text in the "Get Credit for What you Know" seminars I teach. There's just a lot more I want to add, and at 1800 words a day, it would certainly progress quickly. On the other hand, it is National NOVEL Writing Month. Perhaps I should finish the book I started last year. It was coming along fairly nicely, and I'd love to see how it resolves. And then there's that mystery I've been toying with for years. And the middle-grade biographies...

That's the other thing you need to know about NaNo-- you don't have to have a plot, or even consider yourself a good writer in order to participate. No one is going to check your manuscript for run-on sentences, illogical plot twists, or misspelled words (though there is no excuse for misspellings when we all have spell-check keeping us in line! Though there's no spell-check when blogging, so don't expect perfection;-).). All you have to do to prove you've written your 50,000 words is to e-mail your file to headquarters, where a computer will automatically verify your word count. After that, it's up to you to edit out all the stuff you added to pad your word count on the more challlenging days!

The founder of NaNoWriMo, Chris Baty, has written a helpful book to get you started. It's called No Plot, No Problem A Low-Stress, High-Velocity Guide to Writing a Novel in 30 Days. He's done the 30-day novel thing often enough that he has a lot of great advice on how to get it done, including week-by-week tips on how you'll feel as you frantically type your way through the month. It's tremendously encouraging, and it helps to know that after you slog your way through the most difficult week, there's relatively smooth sailing ahead. Chapter titles are almost as much fun as the process-- I mean, who doesn't need "Time-Finding, News-Breaking, and a Step-by-Step Guide to Transforming Loved Ones into Effective Agents of Guilt and Terror"?

Seriously, NaNo is a wonderful tool, not only for amateurs who need writing practice, but also for stuck writers who need help breaking through a creative block. Just as it's nearly impossible to have 'quality time' without having spent a significant amount of 'quantity time,' it's pretty much impossible to write well without having written a lot.

(I'd remove the qualifiers if I weren't wedded to the use of weasel words by the annoying people who feel compelled to search out the one, teeny-tiny remote example of the person who never wrote anything in his life, but suddenly produced a blockbuster novel out of the blue. The fact remains that quality time springs from quantity time, and writing well is the result of writing often.)

As you don't have to show your work to anyone, NaNo helps you get past the perfectionist mindset, and makes production the point of the exercise. It has been said that perfection is the enemy of the good, and that's true. Writing is a process that contains five steps--

Reading/Research
Thinking on Paper (aka brainstorming)
Organizing Ideas
Writing
Revising

I don't care if you're writing fiction or non-fiction-- each of the five steps is essential. A fiction work will most likely take less reading and reasearch than a non-fiction work, but not necessarily. Historical fiction, for example, must be accurate if you want to maintain credibility with your readers.

Where NaNo comes in, though, is in the writing stage. You'll notice that in the five stages, writing precedes revision. That's right-- you have to write before you can polish and perfect your work. So why do so many people feel they have to begin by writing perfect prose? It's not possible, and that is why there is a fifth step. While the perfectionist is sitting over a blank sheet of paper waiting for a perfectly formed opening sentence to spring to mind, the writer is on chapter three and typing as if there were no tomorrow. Sure, he's going to have to go back and tidy up his prose. By the time the perfectionist has wadded up his 29th sheet of paper (please... such a self-dramatizing gesture-- don't bother) and tossed it into the wastebasket, the writer has hundred of words written, and something to work with. He'll probably revise parts of his book a dozen times before it's complete, but he'll always be ahead of the poor schlump who sits there waiting for perfection.

So... I want to do NaNo again-- got to go look at my calendar! How about you?

(Remember to order No Plot, No Problem for encouragement as you write!

Day 1

Entering the 21st century....

Topics of interest:

Literature (or as they say down in the neighborhood-- BOOKS)
Creative arts
Home-centered living
Much, much more (but I can't cover it all here!)

I'll be posting reviews, links to interesting and relevant articles and newsletters, and whatever seems useful-- I hope you'll join me!